Shifted Paradise
Keya Dutt
I had stopped my blog because the Pandemic swallowed the two years in our lives. I stopped publishing, I stopped writing yet there was so much happening.
For one I shifted out of my ancestral residence and left behind the forest of plants I had grown. These plants attracted squirrels and birds of all hues, so much so I thought I was caught in a Disney world of a comical picturisation where birds chirped overhead and squirrels snacked on nuts at my feet. You know what I mean - you know what I am referring to? In actuality yellow birds cooed on the palm tree that peeped just above my verandah railing on my third floor home. And they cooed persistently through the day. The squirrels scampered on the balcony railing, often tangling with my hair and scaring me and frightening them.
This was my little patch of paradise. I became reclusive; I preferred staying in with them and my books. And kept Covid at bay, not quite of course, despite vaccinations Omicron caught me and I was moved to a Nursing Home where a bat from hell nursed me and taught me that the nursing profession was absolutely not with human kindness.
Then we shifted to a 10th floor apartment facing the Lakes. Surrounded by the green trees, the waters of the Lakes to be gazed at from every window, I fought the heaviness in my chest and the lump in my throat at the memories of the ancestral home. The birds here are limited to shrill magpies that flock at exactly 4.30pm to roost on my bedroom window box grille. No, sorry, they don’t roost but scream at each other, fluff out their wings aggressively and screech. But the squirrels don’t visit and I can’t be a recluse because there are two lifts and I am told I have to use these, we paid for them. But my head still reels with the memories of so many who had lived and died there in the ancestral home. So many memories cluttered my mind not only with people, but incidents and events in my very eventful life in the ancestral home.
This home was where I discovered Mary Shelly’s Frankenstein and fought the many Frankensteins as I lived through the years. I was apparently the first woman detective in India, however Anandana Kapur who made a film on women detectives and me, assured me there are many who lay claim to that. The many Frankensteins I laid to rest in my short stint as a female dick would require at least one novel. This home is also where as an aunt told me I should write my life story and a damn good bestseller it would be too. This blog is too short for all that.
I avoid visiting the street where the home is or was, because I believe they are breaking it down now. The plants I had grown have been uprooted, or so I am told. The roof top where there were many barbeque parties and live music often, bore witness to my forgetfulness; because often I would invite a crowd of people and get the dates mixed up. But blessed with a small troop of domestic help, I managed to sail through such misty memories. Even that roof top is half gone, I hear. It is so painful, it is better not to dwell on it.
As I write this blog my mind unfixes from the ancestral house and thinks on the Morbi disaster. I weep at the thought of the fifty little children in their shiny new clothes out to celebrate the Sunday family outing. They died, scores of them in the muddy waters, leaving behind a baby shoe and such heart wrenching possessions. Who do we blame? Because we need someone to blame as catharsis. I think it is the class of professions that this Yuga of Kali has spawned, the politicians, who are to blame. Our dear PM had once said the bridge collapse in Kolkata is the hand of God at play what does he say about Morbi? God forbid it was hand of God, but then comes the question, who’s God. Who will answer that question?
The problem is the long delay in writing this blog has crowded my mind with myriad issues and theories. What is happening in Iran and conversely what is happening in the courts in Karnataka is spinning on the same issue, personal freedom. However it is ironic that while women in one place wish to throw off the reins of subjugation, it is in another place that women demand the freedom to don the same.
Why is Putin not ending his war in Ukraine? I am told by a Russian expert that Putin is of Chenghis Khan Bloodline and therefore, like a pit bull dog refuses to let go of that which he has bitten off, even if it barely fits between his jaws.
This Yin and Yang of life makes life interesting. This very pull and push … I recently published a book by a dancer who has spent a life worshipping Mohini Attam. Initially I confided that the person who translated the Natyashastra Monmotho Ghosh was my grandmother’s uncle. He also taught at Presidency University. I of course am convinced that my love for the Sanskrit treatise must be because I am M. Ghosh reborn. But then the experience of publishing the dancer’s memoirs was excruciatingly troublesome, M. Ghosh notwithstanding. So I may as well get on with living this life. Whatever life has in store for me.
For instance we have moved to an apartment building of forty flats. I enjoy that. But thank goodness there are not too many among the forty flat owners trying to move me out of my comfort zone by socializing! I do enjoy my neighbours but from a distance. For the moment I shall keep the volume of my music low, my voice even lower and try not to pull or shift furniture at unearthly hours. So till the next time …Or at least till the Climate Woe does not get us!
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